Are writers really JUST writing about themselves as they write characters?
I have rebuffed that notion for the longest time, thinking along the lines of like serial killer novelists, thinking to myself, the writer of this can't possibly be like that in real life. So how closely are writers attached to the characters that they create? What are the limits?
Lemme start by staying that there most certainly are limits. I know in my own writing I have a hard time creating any ol' character. Like someone who is supper smart, say an award winning chemist or a brilliant mathematician. I also have a hard time with comics and people who joke telling comes naturally too. Now on the introspective stuff, I THINK I can hold my own. BUT there are some definite holes in my writing game.
The crux of this post came to me as I was working on the novel and started to see character traits of MYSELF in the characters I was creative: both the good and bad guys. As a human being I am pretty cold. At least that's how I see myself. I'm not a warm fuzzy kind of guy. I'm kind of an asshole. THAT'S a big part of my main henchmen's personality in the "Thars" series. But I also have a much broader and deeper side, where I view history in broader context. THAT'S how one of the tenants of the hero's on the good side.
So which is it? Is E.C. Henry a good guy or a bad guy?
"O my, what have I done" (typical reaction in re-reading my edits)
Well, as an author you have to be both! At least that's the way I see it.
Writing fiction is an exploration into the unknown. It's not known until you have it written down and it can be deciphered. But as a writer you go into the unknown and what you bring back ends up having some of your DNA in it, the good, the bad, the ugly.
No, I don't think every character I've written is a reflection of myself. One of the characters I'm most proud of, which is in "Revenge of the Fat Chicks" is so unlike myself. I'm VERY PROUD of that character, because to this day I DON'T see any of myself in her, but she's like her own complete person. And as a writer that's one of the coolest feelings you can have: to bring something to life, and NOT have it bare a direct resemblance to yourself.
Writers deserve respect because the craft is hard. You have to be witty, create interesting plots, and fill those plots with engaging characters. In order to do so, the person doing this work has to be BIG. That's right, BIG. What I mean by that is you can't be shallow, but HAVE TO be able to see the bigger picture. This requires a depth of internal character in the writer of fiction.
The more I write, the less I think of myself. I think I'm a bad writer. I think I'm a bad person in general. My own badness does, however, serve a purpose: it shows how much I need Jesus and the holy bible. I don't wanna be my own god. God is so much better than me. Better in character. Better in handling and despersing power. Better in the choices that He makes.
I think it's a miracle whenever I actually do something right--especially when it comes to writing. To me writing is a grind. It doesn't come easy. It very rarely flows. I'm just a shit writer and it shows on the pages. No wonder it's taken me so long to write this series. I'm shit!
Honest editing can be brutal
The funny thing is, taking shots at myself doesn't bother me. I'd rather go for gold and come up empty, than be complacent and just except poor writing as gold, and try to sell it to other's that way. And so I dig on... Trying to find those nuggets of gold. Spending hours upon hours laboring over an initial character intro to finally "get it right", or at least as right as a shit writer like me can make it.
The Kim Kardashian style: selfie city, all commercial, lots of fluff. ZERO substance
One thing I know for sure is that E.C. Henry is NOT a commercial novelist, he is a literary novelist. I am NEVER going to be a fast writer/that guy who cranks book after book on a timely schedule. Rather, I'm going to be that guy in the salt mine who puts in 12-16 hour days in search of gold. I'm going to go through that fuckin' pan of mine until I find something of worth. Hopefully that'll show on the pages I write. Unfortunately, I'm a shit writer so don't expect much.
Personally, I hope that very little of myself shows on the pages I write. I don't think I'm an interesting enough person to warrant being written about. But that's part of creative process, reaching beyond yourself and going into the unknown and coming back with something new and cool.
I don't go into character creation hoping to instill a bit of myself into the characters I create. Rather, I go exploring hoping to create something new and exciting along the way. I am NOT the characters I create. I hope they're all better than me. More interesting. More evocative.