Never doubt the way people can bounce back. Earlier in the my dad's karate career he made friends with a fellow karate enthusiast who also worked for a time at Boeing, where my dad worked untill he retired about 10 years ago. My dad's friend is a very complex person. He owns his own consulting business and can be very eccentric at times. He is a great charismatic talker is almoast always the center of attention when our two family's converged for gatherings over the years. This guy is real hard to explain because there's a lot to him. At times he has really pissed my dad off, because of his selfishness and lack of consideration of other people's feeling. But at other times he is the most generous person on the planet and a lot of fun to party with. O! And his wife is one the most laidback peeople you're ever going to meet, and is quite a bit younger than my dad's friend.
(Sorry for not using their real names, it's just my dad's friend does ulta-high end consulting work, I'm talking with MAJOR companies and I don't want a Google search of his name to sully his repution and business prospect. And, YEAH, that could happen)
Anywho, my dad a major falling out with his ex-best friend a couple years ago. My dad was very unhappy with a string of slights from his best friend over the years, and decided he had enough and just stopped hanging out with him. Truth be told I had always equated this guy and his wife as JUST being my dad's friend, and then later as mom's and Dennie's as well; as they had a history of taking off and doing lavish boating vaccations together. I had been this guy's house before, but I'd always been kind of standoffish towards he and his wife. But recently something changed in that dynamic, and now I can honestly say, I have a GREAT deal of respect and admiration for my dad's ex-friend and his wife. I'll never see them the same way again. And it's all because of one reason:
They came to my aunt's funeral and celebration of life memorial.
They did this at a time when their friendship to my dad and mom was at a real low point; they weren't on speaking terms. YET, somehow word got out to my dad's ex-friend and he was there at the funeral. Both he and his wife did the A-MAZING; they stepped out and went out into a somber event when they weren't even on good terms with my parents. YES, they knew and loved Denny. But to actually step out and be brave enough to face ex-friends that you're now in kind of an estranged relationship to was something I'll never forget. I will always respect that about this guy, no matter what he does for the rest of his life, he will always command my respect because he took a chance and was brave when it was easiest just to let go.
A man's pride is a intersting thing. It can make a guy do the strangest stuff. Through this I've learned a lot about the power of grudges. But even more so, I've learned the lesson that people have an amazing ability to suprise, and sometimes do things which go beyond what you think they ever will. My dad's friend is the kind of person.
We went to his house today as invited guests, and I was blow away by some of the high-end, custom, landscaping work they had done. My dad's affluent friend now has a spacious, roofed cedar deck with a outdoor fireplace. He has made his front yard a marvel as well. He has a water fountain, and outside fire pit, and several park-like walkways. My description really isn't doing the place justice either. We spent HOURS today relaxing in his covered outside deck. Sooo relaxing.
(Not what my dad's friend has,but isn't this cool too!)
They had this propane fueled ouside fire pit over some gravel. Kind of a modern look, and appeared to be highly warm--untill you realized that the REAL heat was coming from an infared heater which was above the fire pit coming down on it. Really liked that trick and it fooled most everyone into putting their hands to the fire, when really all the heat was coming down on them from above the roof of the outdoor cedar roof where the infared heater was mounted. I've ALWAYS been intereaged with outside fireplaces, and my dad's friend has the coolest one I've ever seen. IF I ever come into money I really wanna have somthing like they have...
Maybe it's human nature to compare what your have to your friend and be jealous. But looking my dad's (and now my) friends who live in the rural outskirts of Maple Valley and Renton, I don't find myself jealus of them. One. Single. Bit! Rather, I'm just so happy they have a nice house which is so ripe for them to have rich memories for the rest of their life. Both of my dad's friends work very hard at their jobs and deserve the lush rewards they have at their house. My house, on the other hand, needs A LOT of work. And even with that work I know that it will never compare favorable to what my dad's friend has--and I'm cool with that. I'm not the jealous envying type. Rather, all I wanna do is be a blessing to people. To alow God's love to shine through me in whatever capcacity that goes. To God be the glory!
I'm just so glad people like my dad's affluent friends exist. People with the ablity to suprise. Just blows away so much prejudice and needless backbitting. When see someone go outside their comfort zone, and put the past behind them and reach out in times of need, there's just something about it that is too magical for words. Truly, humanity at its best.
So now it looks as though my dad's friendship with this guy has been rebooted and given a fresh life. And in this rebirth, I'm going to be active partispant going forward. I think I've been making inchworm progess towards being more a family gathering and friendly, accepting guy--but I definatley haven't always been that way. My writer's side is very strong, and strongly oppinionated. Maybe it's because I'm a little older now and see the world differently than when I was younger. Even as little as five years ago I was open to totally leaving my family behind if I ever got discovered and living the Hollywood life, however that shook down for me. But over the past five years or so, I've been slowly warming up to family and trying to be more active in family activties. Now, I don't think I would ever leave my family to set out on my own and "make it" as a creative, supporting myself now with creative expression as a writer.
Family matters. And now even close family friends matter to me as well. My dad's friend and his wife are truly great and wonderful people. And in the the future I'm going to try to dig even deeper roots with them and get to know and love their family more.
It's so weird and wonderful the course of life goes sometimes. My precious aunt Denny died, just a little less than a month ago. And in her wake a friendship was reborn. You can't script real life like this. Changes in a man's heart are matters of the Lord. He is doing something here. And these seeds from the Master are precious ones. Don't ever take your friendships lightly. God brings people together for a reason. So be open to that and good thing are bound to come.
My heart rejoices in what's going on between our two families. YES, we are very different. But God is doing something here, and I want to be a part of it, even if I don't fully understand and see what Jesus is doing. To God be glory!
Sincerely,
E.C. Henry from Bonney Lake, WA
P.S. Starting this Thursday I'm doing on my third graduation of a writer's retreat down to Long Beach, WA. Gunna try to "redeem" myself and have a productive time of writing. Staying at the same hotel as last time too. Hey, last time the hotel wasn't the problem--I was! Gunna really try to curtail my drinking of alchol down there EXCLUSIVELY to beer and mix drinks ONLY at dinner time. I think that'll go a long way towards keeping me on the path of the straight and narrow, and hopefully getting a lot of work done. Going to be more varried then last time too. Gunna take some time to DRAW some prelimary pictures to accent the beginning of the chapters. Got a few ideas in my head, just need to do some prelinaries. Someday, God willing, I hope to hire a gifted drawer to draw better pictures to accent each chapter in the tradition of C.S. Lewis' "The Chroicles of Narnia". We'll see, but you gotta start somewhere. And sometimes that initial spark of momentum needs to come from you.
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