Inside the Brain of E.C. Henry

What's a Pre-Pro Screenwriter Gotta Be Thankfull for These Days?

Well, it's that time of the year again, when we give thanks.  Doesn't matter what walk of life you're from.  Here in the good ol' U.S. of A. we celebrate a holiday on a given Thursday near the end of the month in November, and that holiday is Thanksgiving Day.  But from my frame of reference what does a pre-pro screenwriter have to be thankful for these days?

From Hollywood, NOTHING!!  Is Hollywood breaking in any new screenwriters?  Is Hollywood making any pre-pro screenwriter's dreams come true.  FUCK.  NO!  Rather from Hollywood what we're all getting is a never ending litany of movies that underwhelm, and make you wonder how so much money can go into these movies, and yet their end product is nearly always mediocre.  

Sounds like another rant from a frustrated pre-pro screenwriter right?  Naw, I'm not going to bash Hollywood too much, because I actually want to be there involved in the movie-making industry someday.  I still believe their are a lot of hyper-talented people there.  The potential is greater than ever before for Hollywood to make great movies.  But something is missing at the top.  And I'm talking the tip-top.  It's taste and style.  Think I'm alone thinking this?  Well, actually I'm not.  In fact recently George Lucas (the brains behind "Star Wars" shared sentiment that backs me up and proves my point from an insider's position.

But this is the season for giving thanks, so lemme give you a list of some things this pre-pro screenwriter, E.C. Henry, is thankful for:

1. E.C. Henry is thankful for the fact that he lives in the United States of America.  A country where I'm alotted the freedom to follow my bliss, write movies, and file for protection for those movies I've written under U.S. Copyright law.
2. E.C. Henry is thankful for a loving, supportive mother who listens to my scripts and gives me her feedback.  
3. E.C. Henry is thankful for God's allotment of life given to me and the era I live in.  I'm able to write the GREAT movies I've penned largely because of the era I live in.  What if God so chose to have me live in the 18th century, the 1st century A.D, or sometime before Christ?  Had that been the case I never would have written what I've written.  And like God's creation, it is good.  All the stories I've written are good.
4. E.C. Henry is thankful for Final Draft Software.  What a blessing it is not to have to remember all the formatting rules.  With Final Draft all of that is done for you.  Final Draft makes the process of writing a script a lot easier, and I'm grateful for that.
5. E.C. Henry is thankful for the own skill he's cultivated over the year of FINISHING.  WHAT.  HE HAS STARTED!  I'm not a braggart.  I don't daydream about writing, I actually do it.  And I'm grateful that I'm a finisher of what I start.  YES, the epic fantasy novel is taking a long time to do, but I'm chipping away at it--just as I've done before with every other story I took from idea to completion.
6. E.C. Henry is thankful for a day job that pays well and allows him to pursue what he really loves to do, which is write original stories.  
7. E.C. Henry is thankful for having a vivid imagination.  Yes, I've been bashed before in reviews, and on the Internet, but when I write I'm very good with visualizing the place I'm writing about.  That's NEVER been a problem for me.  Yes, sometimes I have been delayed with plot stoppers, not having an answer for something that I know is wrong and holding up the story.  But my imagination is second to none.  E.C. Henry has a very vivid imagination.
8. E.C. Henry is grateful for spell checkers.  I miss-spell a lot of words.  Some IDIOTS out there think that's the lone barometer that identifies a "good" writer from a "bad" writer.  But that's a very shallow approach, and I'm thankful I don't share that opinion.
9. E.C. Henry is grateful for Dragon Natural Speaking Software. The ability to playback sections of my novel is really cool.  Personally I think all word processing programs should have audio playback, but I digress.
10. E.C. Henry is thankful for all the "good" romantic comedies out there.  Denied a "good" romance in my own life, I often turn to the movies to fill the void for what's lacking in my own life.  

So there you have it.  E.C. Henry's 2014 Thanksgiving Day post.  I hope y'all have a safe and restful Thanksgiving.  Don't know about you but I have a very structured Thanksgiving Day planned.  Gunna wake up in a couple of hours and go for a very, very long run with my family's two dogs: Micah (a black poodle) and Sam (a golden lab); then it's on to rolling coins (I do this every year at Thanksgiving), then it's on to horderves and NFL football, followed by the Thanksgiving Day meal, then it's on to beers and pina coladas as the Seahawks face off against the 49ers in San Fransisco, then it's onto games with the family and more consumption of alcoholic beverages and the like.  O, and somewhere along the line I hope to play with Brycen, my 6 year-old nephew, and do some editing on the epic fantasy novel that I'm working on.  

Brian Billick from NFL Broadcasting; Celebrating Characters in the Entertainment Industry: Volume VII

Lemme start this post out by saying I was NEVER a fan of Brian Billick until AFTER he became a commentator on broadcasts of NFL football games.  He certainly wasn't a favorite of mine when he was the coach of the Baltimore Ravens, as ONE of my favorite teams that I root for on a regular basis is the Pittsburgh Steelers, hence by extension I had a natural bias against the head coach of one my favorite teams most fiercest rivals.

But over the years, as I watch Brian Billick call more and more NFL games, my opinion of him slowly changed the more I heard him speak.  Brian Billick is so knowledgeable about the NFL game, both the "X's" and "O's" and insight into player personnel.  

Then recently, now that I have cable I started getting access to the NFL Nework programming, and then I started watching Brian Billick as part of the trio who worked on "Playbook" which also has Sterling Sharpe and ex NY Giant, offensive lineman Shaun O'Hara, as this trio dissects plays from NFL games and gauge the future week's match-up.  Sterling Sharpe is a GREAT speaker, very lively and keeps things going.  But in this show every time I watch I marvel at how good Brian Billick is.  Not only can this guy break down film, but he has some character and wit about him that is entertaining.  And Brian Billick is SOOO smooth in playing off Shaun O'Hara and Sterling Sharpe, Brian's co-hosts on "Playbook".  I marvel at how good Brian Billick is because in life you find that some guys are real good at doing technical things, but lack on the personal side.  But to my amazement Brian Billick in Hollywood polished good at mixing it up with other people, and then is always ready to "bring it" when it comes to breaking down plays and explaining why they do or do not work.  

Here's a list of several of my favorite sports callers:

1. Brian Billick: Best mix of detailed NFL geared "X" and "O" knowledge vs. the personal side of the wit and interacting with the others in his broadcast team.
2. Howard Cosell: best play-by-play announcer EVER.  I don't think anyone will ever do it as well as Howard Cosell did it back in the day.  Howard Cosell revolutionized the dramatization of the NFL game during his stint on Monday Night Football in the 70s through the early 1980s.
3. Wayne Larrivee: Best voice doing play-by-play, NFL games.  Wayne calls games for the Green Bay Packers, and anytime I hear him calling a game somewhere else I'm pleasantly pleased.
4. Kevin Calabarro: Used to make listen to the NBA's Seattle Supersonics over the radio very enjoyable.  Very creative in his descriptions, and always brings a lot of energy to the table.
5. Boomer Essiason: I LOVE hearing this guy on radio broadcasts of Monday Night Football.  Boomer usually provides interesting insight, and isn't afraid to speak his mind, which is something I respect.  Boomer Essiason is not a tofu broadcaster.  Do you know what I mean?  So many of the guys out there come across as "politically correct", yes men.  Not so with Boomer Essiason, and I appreciate that! 
6. Troy Aikman.  I just like his style, a very solid color commentator on FOX, NFL broadcasts.
7. Todd Blackledge: On the occasional ESPN college football broadcast I watch, I really appreciated Todd's straightforward approach.  
8. Jimmy Johnson: An acquired tasted.  HATED him for years, but now as the years roll on I find he's more palatable in the FOX booth.
9. Marv Albert: From the 90s I thought he did a great job calling NBA games.  Very distinctive voice.  
10. Dion Sanders: Another acquired taste.  Used to hate him, but he's grown on me.
11. Trent Dilfer: an ex-Seahawk player who is VERY GOOD at dissecting players strengths and weaknesses.

So in closing, check out Brian Billick on the NFL Network's "Playbook", he really brings a great mix of knowledge and entertainment to breakdowns of NFL games in progress or in review.  And if Pete Carrol ever leaves Seattle I really hope Paul Allen makes Brian Billick the next head coach of the Seattle Seahawks.  Brian Billick is the best, and I like him!

P.S. Still hard at work on that pesky epic fantasy novel thing.  You KNOW more posts are coming on that, AND real soon I'll be doing a very big, 50th installment of "Exploring Issues in Rom-com Movies", so stay tuned.  Keep visiting my site, and don't be shy about posting a comment!

Funny Pre-Christmas Quote

Sometimes I Say Merry Christmas--just to piss people off!

Seriously, someone at work ACTUALLY said that to me today.  Yes, we we're having a private conversation.  It was pleasant... and then the guy I was talking too dropped this bombshell, and I knew I had to post it.

Sometimes I say Merry Christmas--just to piss people off!!

How can ANYONE say this?!?

To me, this is an indictment against our society as a whole. The guy who said this was serious, and it was an obvious dig against where we are in American society today where there are people out there who have the audacity to actually be offended when someone says, "Merry Christmas."  What a joke!

Now I know not everyone is a Christian, and Christmas IS a Christain holiday, where people such as myself celebrate the birth of the Lord Jesus Christ.  

Don't accept Jesus as your Lord and Master?  Your loss, pall.  Jesus coming to Earth to show us the way, and be an example of how to please the Almighty Father IS worthy of celebrating.  Sure, in today's society we are FORCED to made A LOT of concessions to non-believers.  But honestly what is the harm in wishing someone a merry Christmas?  I don't celebrate Halloween, rather I think it is a DEMONIC HOLIDAY that should be shunned not celebrated, but I don't fall to pieces when some wayward soul wishes me a happy Halloween.  

So going forward, as the holiday season gets going.  Don't tell people to, "Have a Merry Christmas," just to piss them off.  That is just wrong.  Dead wrong.  You're missing the whole spirit of the season.  If I know someone who isn't into the holiday I don't rub it in their face.  Rather, I try to keep with the spirit of the season, and just be nice to that wayward soul who is missing out on the joy of this time of year.

So say it loud.  Say it proud.  But also say it reverently.  Christmas is supposed to be a merry time of year.  Let's keep it that way.

- E.C. Henry from Bonney Lake, WA

The Long, Lonely Journey

Sometimes I wonder if I've bitten off more than I can chew recommencing the journey to complete a MAMMOTH, epic fantasy novel that originally embarked on back in the early to mid 1990s.  Comparatively speaking writing a script is a breeze--and even those I found to be grueling and hard.  YES, I've completed 18 spec. scripts, 19 if you count the "Planet of the Apes" script that a FOX VP wrote me a cease and desist letter when I contacted them for permissions.

I guess the point of this post is perspective in the process.  Some of novel editing is a lot of fun to do.  Like when I get to draw on my past and infuse my own point of view on who the perfect girls are, as seen by my two protagonists in this epic fantasy story I'm crafting.  But some of the editing is a grind too.  Like now when I have to revisit intermediate conversations which bridge the action, which is where I'm at now.  

What pains me so much is that there is so much editing to do.  I figure I'll be at this story for at least two more years.  Yes, I know the story, how it begins, goes, and ultimately how it ends.  And for the most part I don't foresee changing the key plot points.  But getting a finished product that's worthy of being showed...  Well that's where I get a little overwhelmed.  

Thankfully I have a lot of interesting characters to explore.  Lots of good guys.  Lots of bad guys.  

Right now my immediate goal is to get chapter 2 of this novel to an acceptable level of completion and show it to my mom and aunt.  Chapter 2 is a very critical chapter which sets up and launches the master story.  It clearly sets the dynamic of the two protagonists in motion.  And in my heart I really feel chapter 2 is one I need to nail and make shine.  Hence the reason I've camped out in it for the past month and a half.  

So will ol' E.C. Henry EVERY finish this opus of his?  I hope so.  But so much depends on the grace of God.  Will He grant me enough life to bring this story to an acceptable place of completion?  All to often we take that key varriable for granted.  Way back when I was writing "Cowboy Alien Diaries" many years back, I actually thought I was going to die before I brought that story to completion.  Honest truth, I walked off in the woods and prayed to God for an extention of life so that I could finish that story.  Thankfully, the good Lord didn't take my life then.  I was able to finish that story and bring it to place that I was genuinely proud of, ie. I finally got the story as good as I'm capable of making it; which is always my goal in writing.  

A long time ago when I was writing the 1st draft of this epic fantasy story back in the 90s, I actually recruited a girl I knew from one of the fast food restaurant jobs I had that helped me pay for college.  This girl was the same age as me, and she read A LOT!  I mean this girl was ALWAYS reading some novel.  I figured her experience would help me make my writing better.  Living in Idaho at the time I used to mail her out chapters for her to critique, with the understanding that she would read that and give me some feedback.  Unfortunately, nothing she ever said really helped me improve my draft.  Instead she often sent me back portions of stories that she had written!  

One time when I came back and visited my folks I took this girl with me and we actually visited the place where my epic fantasy novel begins.  Even this day trip was strained.  I think this girl wanted to spark a romance with me, but I kinda dragged my feet about that.  She ended up saying some really bizarre things, and then eventually I stopped writing her, and we went our separate ways.  

In retrospect, I think I was fair with this girl. I was too selfish, to centered on getting my writing better, and not sensitive enough to her feelings.  A few years later I had a chance run in with this girl at an unemployment resource center and when I went up and said, "Hi" to her she completely locked up and froze in position, not saying "Hi" back or anything.  

Weird, huh?

Life will throw you many curves, and that encounter with that girl was definitely one of them.  

So it's a long, lonely journey writing a novel.  You're dreaming things up, hoping one day that your work will be good enough to get published, or in the case of the screenplays I've written made into movies, but in the interm it's a long, lonely journey.  

Hopefully this weekend I can finish my latest rev. of chapter 2 and show it to my mom and aunt.  Someday down the road I'm going to pay a freelance editor to check out the novel and give me some professional feedback.  Then someday it's on to the publishing houses.  I'm really not crazy about self publishing, but it that's the road I'm forced to take, well, I guess I'll have to bite the bullet and do that.  Need to find a illustrator.  Like C.S. Lewis' "The Chronicles of Narnia" I want a picture which encapsulates some of the action at the beginning of each chapter.  "The Chronicles of Narnia" IS my gold standard.  I want my epic fantasy novel someday to be as good as C.S. Lewis' classic series.  

Aim high: hit the high mark.  Yes, it can be argued that J.R.R. Tolkien's "The Lord of the Rings" series is better than C.S. Lewis' "The Chronicles of Narnia" book series, but there is something magical about C.S. Lewis' work that trumps J.R.R. Tolkien, and that's factoring God into the story.  My story definitely has a God element to it, and I have NO PLANS WHATSOEVER to take that out of my story.  I don't care if our modern society is drifting away from godliness, I want godliness in my work!  I want to honor my Creator in what I'm writing. He's in my story, and I have no plans whatsoever to ever take Him out.  

Life is better with God in it.  Even when you're currently entrenched in a long, lonely journey, it is the Lord who lightens your load, and gives you the strength to carry your precious work to completion.  The arm of flesh fails.  But the strong arm of the Lord God Almighty never fails.  And it is upon His strength and endurance that I rely.  Even when endeavoring to go down the long, lonely journey that is writing a masterpiece novel.

- E.C. Henry from Bonney, Lake, WA

The Fun Part of Writing: Getting to Write The Ideal Woman

Some times your writing life can throw you a bone.  Okay, so as I proceed writing this post MAYBE I should watch how I mix my metaphors, but's that's how I feel right now.  I'm at a GREAT spot in my current writing; I get to edit and rewrite a section of prose where my lead protagonist lovingly recalls two girls in his life that took his breath away.

So what makes the ideal girl?  Well, there are a lot of hotties running around right now.  My nodd goes to Margot Robbie.  (And, no, that blond off to the left is not her)  THAT girls is to die for...  But then you have some of the more obvious choices floating around too.  Kim and Kanye would have you believe that Kim Kardashian--and that amazing butt of hers--is the pinacle of femine perfection.  Or perhaps models such as Heide Klum or Giselle influence your persuasion.  We do after all live in a generation of decadence, what with all those Victoria's Secret models who make a splash every year.

But what I'm finding as I'm writing, I'm not drawing on the beauties of today to be the ideals in my writing.  Rather, I'm drawing on the past and notes, observations and feelings I had for girls when I was growing up in high school, which are influencing me the most.  And I think that how it works for most people.  When you're young at some point in your life, you get a taste of love, even if it's from a far (as it ALWAYS was in my case).  

Anywho, what I'm getting at here in this post is the fact that it's better to pull from your past when writing romance, rather then to let the whims on the winds of today tell you how romance should go, especially if you're a writer trying to influence and spawn interest in romance in your own creative writing.  

I think modern-day celebrities, the image they try to project and the how love is portrayed in the tabloids is toxic and unclean place to find the inspiration for writing great romance.  Everyday for the past two years I swear I've seen a cover article on Jennifer Aniston's upcoming marriage to Justin Theoux.  Are they going to get married?  Has one of them gotten cold feet.  Will Jennifer Aniston ever find true love?  

Jennifer Aniston has been blessed with great looks.  I'm not here to debate that.  But at some point this drug out story of her love life gets old.  I wonder what's really in her head.  I guess a lot of people do, that's why she keep making the cover of all these magazines.  

And as for Kim Kardashian... Well, she's just ridiculous. Runway model caliber beauty, MAYBE, but she just seams to be everything as prank for maintaining her popularity.  I have no real interest in knowing more about Kim Kardashian because I fear that if I knew more, I'd wanna know less.  Do you know what I mean?

I site Jennifer Aniston and Kim Kardashian as means of a contrast.  My take on modern day romance and what could spawn the imagination of millions in a fictional novel isn't going to come from either one of these hoties--it's going to come from memories.  Memories of real life girls, that God so blessed me to come in contact with.  Girls that left an impression on me as to what beauty is.  What the American dream is.  And what a real functioning love could be like, as a result of what saw from girls from my past who influenced me.

Am I superficial as all fuck?  No.  I may be fucked as pertains to ever getting to experience a meaningful romance with a girl I'm attracted to, but I'm not superficial as all fuck.  If I were superficial as all fuck the Jennifer Aniston tabloid fodder, and Kim Kardashian selfies would have a more tangible affect on how I view beauty and romance.  But alas they don't.  Rather the cumulative efforts of both Jennifer Aniston and Kim Kardashian make me laugh waaaay more then they make me horny.  

The cool thing is what I'm writing now I get to write about two, cool, hot girls and their collective affect on my protagonist which is also related to the mastermind villain in my story.  And no, I don't have one of those shallow subplots where the hero of my story has a love affair with the daughter of the main villain.  Come on now, you want weak dreck like that go back and read the Conan the Barbarian series, you won't find any of that in the epic fantasy story I'm writing now.

BUT what you will find, is love.  What it's like for a a teenage boy to be in love.  What it's like for a teenage boy to see the ideal, then face a choice of how that ideal will impact his own romances, the goals he sets, and the dreams he pursues.  

I love going deep.  Getting deep.  And being interesting.  

Cue up that infamous song from The Cars, "You Might Think I'm Crazy" but I'll take the girls of my past over the likes of Jennifer Anniston, Kim Kardashian, Beyonce, and any other lady who comes down the pike and tries to be all that.  

What makes you dream?  Is it the practical women that you've come in contact with, and secretly dream about, or is it the women of the tabloids who ever present in the news, tabloids and Internet?  For me it's the girls who shaped what romance could be, and that all happened for me in a 10 year span, age 14 through 24.  Sure, sprinkle in a little Joe Elliot at the onset, as with the release of Deff Leopard's " Pyromania" and the videos which came off that record, really influenced me as to what a valiant young man SHOULD be so as to get the idea girls I was around age 14 through 24.

Anyway, I find my past really affects what I write and why I write the way I do.  And I'm not afraid to go there.  Look, and really challenge what I thought then, was it right, how has that changed now, and where do I go from here.  The honest truth is most of the girl's I like I place on a very high pedestal.  Maybe that's why I never took a shot at any of them.  Well, any of them but one.  And the one I did take a shot me down in such a way that I thought a grenade went off on top of my head!  That rejection left a deepi mpression my psyche.  O, if I had to do it all over again...  I'd probably fuck it all over again, but maybe in more interesting different way.  Gimme a break I'm a fuck-up, and that's what fuck-ups do; they fuck up!!

Even if you're denied romance, it's still fun to think about it.  Why do you think those silly, female romance books sell so well?  Easy, all the girl's what romance in their life.  And guys are kinda the same, only they want there romance in a more physical expression...  

Still, it's all fun.  Romance is fantasy.  And it's fun to go there and explore what could be.  Draw upon the past.  Honor past angels in teenage girl form who helped shape, for better or for worse, how you perceive romance to be.  And that's where I am now.  I get to go back, sure it's for the sake the story, but it's also for more than that.  In a roundabout way I get to pay tribute to the girl's who rocked my world back in the day.  They may have never gotten with me, but the definitely got to me, and I'm going to honor them in this epic fantasy story I'm writing.  Not going to name them by name, but aspects of who they were and their affect on me is definitely going to be there.  Right now I think there's a total of four girls from my past who have shaped the ideals I mention in this epic fantasy story; two directly from my high school experience, two from a fast food job that came after high school.  

- E.C. Henry from Bonney Lake, WA

What Women Want; Exploring Issues in Rom-Com Movies: Volume 49

Sorry about not posting last week.  Excuse: I went to the Seahawks vs. the Raiders with my dad.  Had a few too many beers...  The Seahawks won!  Then the previous week my boss was gone all week and I put in a lot of extra time at work.  Anywho, I am ready to (hopefully) come strong out of the blocks with a strong post, and it comes from the most strangest of sources, "What Women Want" (2000: Mel Gibson, Hellen Hunt, directed by Nancy Myers).

The crazy thing is when I started thinking of the genesis of this post I actually TRIED to watch "What Women Want" (2000), thinking it was part of due diligence, but I found that NO BUSINESS around the local Bonney Lake area carried this movie.  Not Target.  Not Walmart.  Not Safeway.  Not Fred Myer.  And Blockbuster, Video Only, and a place at the South Hill Mall that sold old/used DVDs was out of the question as all those businesses were out of business.  So... as pertains to the actual movie itself I'm going to have to go off memory.  And to be honest I think I've only seen this movie twice, with the last time being about 10 years ago...  Thankfully, I was never planning on doing a whole post JUST based on this movie, but rather was hoping to use this moive as a springboard to a more global and more interesting issue that is based off the movie's title, what women want.

As for the movie itself, I remember "What Women Want" as being a male weighted romantic comedy, where Mel Gibson's character is a macho man, lone ranger type in a business where Helen Hunt's character comes in as his new boss.  With their company's new mandate on marketing towards women, Mel's character is challenged.  And in an attempt to empathise with women he gets drunk, puts on some nail polish and accidentally electrocutes himself in the bathtub, only to wake up the next morning with the power to hear what women around him are thinking in his mind.  Of course as the movie progresses Mel's character sets his sights on winning the heart of his boss, the Helen Hunt character, as you should already know going into this movie since it's a romantic comedy and that's just what the lead do...

Now the movie itself dind't excite me too much, but the open question its title poses, did. 

What do women want?

Since rom-coms are the haven designed for women to flock to, isn't this genre the place where women SHOULD get what they want?  I say, yes.  And irregardless of a given woman's taste the rom-com features a bunch of different ideal types for women to gravitate towards.  Handsome black guy, go see Will Smith in "Hitch".  Talkative, sensitive type, go see Hugh Grant in anything he's been in early 90s though early 2000s.  Man's man, though guy go see Gerald Butler in "The Ugly Truth", "P.S. I love You" or "The Bounty Hunter".  Are you a girl strictly interested in eye candy?  Well, if you are there are rom-coms for you too and leading men to boot, like Matthew McConahuey in "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days" or Ryan Gossling in "Crazy, Stupid, Love."  Wanna lovable, workman type?  What about Bill Pullman in "While You Were Sleeping"?  Like funny guys?  Well there's always Vince Vaughn from "Wedding Crashers".

My point is, a girls ideal guy CAN be found in the rom-com genre for ANY sensitives and criteria a woman has.  

Does that bother me? Fuck no!  I just wanna find ONE girl that I'm interested in, whatever her preconceptions are, that's okay with me; I figure EVERYONE'S got 'em so I don't sweat stuff like that.

Whatever women want, it's alright with me as long as it's moral and not destructive. 

I love wish fulfillment fantasies, and I think that's one of the biggest draws the rom-com genre has to offer: the ablitly to see an idealize mate go through the rigamaroll of romance with a prospective mate.  Fodder for one's own romance it is.  The ideal doesn't ruin it for the rest of us, it sets a bar for us to try to achieve.  

Don't worry about me.  I'm fucked.  I learned LA-ONG ago, I'm NOT what women want.  Message couldn't have been sent any clearer when I was in high school.  Now I'm just fucked.  Wandering around, entertaining vain vanities, because that's all I've got.  Once you hit a certain age you realize the die in your life is set.  Mine is set to fucked.  The girls available to me are not the kind of ones I want to spend the rest of my life with.  

Sigh...

Bathtub revelations are wasted on types like Mel Gibson, when it's hopeless fucks like me that need that inside information.  But what are you gunna do?  Most men don't have super powers, they just live their lives hoping that somewhere along line they make a connection with some woman you'd make a good pairing.  Because that is at the heart of what women want: a connection!  

P.S. I'll TRY to get back into posting on more regular basis.  Still working on the epic fanstasy novel.  La-ong way off from having that ready to show, but I'm still plugging away on it averaging 1-2 hours a day of ediiting.  And as a crazy side note to this post, I had a waitress at a restaurant I went to come over and say how see was a single mother and liked to edit papers.  I think she was throwing herself at me, but I wasn't too crazy about her, just not pretty enough for me to merrit further investigation, though I was nice to her.